[ This is easy for Grey. Touching, seeking out friendship and comfort. On the Train, Gilliam used to reach for Grey, and Grey would respond with willing obedience. He misses how easy they were together. He will never get that back, because Gilliam is gone. Gilliam had been everything to him, and there's a side of him that has no idea how to let that go.
But there's also a side that wants to feel the ease of that companionship again. He likes Drew's smile. He likes the way he feels when he's around him. He likes the scruff of his beard and the way he's friendly, always friendly, always welcoming. Why can't they?
He wonders, for a moment, if Gilliam would be angry.
Then he looks up, meeting Drew's eyes, and seeing his expression the same as it always is - open, warm, friendly, everything that Grey craves so much. This time, when he leans forward, he does kiss him. It comes from instinct rather than decision, because the conflict of it all is still roiling away inside him.
The moment he makes contact, though, he doesn't seem conflicted. Grey is not inexperienced with this. His hands slide over Drew's shoulders and pull him close, and his lips are soft and warm, and very lightly, they tease at Drew's. He leans in, kissing him gently, and then finishing by drawing Drew's lower lip briefly into his mouth. He leans back, lips tingling and heart thudding. He both wants, and is afraid to want.
His eyes search Drew's again, uncertain. Is it okay? Is this what he wants too? ]
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But there's also a side that wants to feel the ease of that companionship again. He likes Drew's smile. He likes the way he feels when he's around him. He likes the scruff of his beard and the way he's friendly, always friendly, always welcoming. Why can't they?
He wonders, for a moment, if Gilliam would be angry.
Then he looks up, meeting Drew's eyes, and seeing his expression the same as it always is - open, warm, friendly, everything that Grey craves so much. This time, when he leans forward, he does kiss him. It comes from instinct rather than decision, because the conflict of it all is still roiling away inside him.
The moment he makes contact, though, he doesn't seem conflicted. Grey is not inexperienced with this. His hands slide over Drew's shoulders and pull him close, and his lips are soft and warm, and very lightly, they tease at Drew's. He leans in, kissing him gently, and then finishing by drawing Drew's lower lip briefly into his mouth. He leans back, lips tingling and heart thudding. He both wants, and is afraid to want.
His eyes search Drew's again, uncertain. Is it okay? Is this what he wants too? ]